Here’s a list of the wide range of symptoms and traits women with AuDHD (Autism and ADHD dual diagnosis) might experience in the months after having a baby. These are all real examples from women I have met during my work as a perinatal peer support worker.
🌻 Self harm – cutting or head banging for self-regulation
🌻 Suicidal thoughts or thoughts that baby and partner would be better off if they weren’t here.
🌻 Low mood and depression due to the sudden drop in hormone levels and loss of previous coping or self-regulation strategies
🌻 Emotional dysregulation linked to sensory overload and lack of sleep – withdrawn one minute with sudden outbursts the next
🌻 Anxiety caused by overwhelm and keeping all the plates spinning at once
🌻 Complex sensory profile – both seeking and avoidant which leads to overload
🌻 Sleep disturbance even if the baby is sleeping okay
🌻 Hypervigilance – not wanting to let others look after baby
🌻 OCD traits inked to stimming/anxiety rather than compulsions
🌻 Social anxiety – unable to get out the house or get to groups
🌻 Low self-esteem and confidence in their ability to be a good mother
🌻 Feeling out of control due to baby’s unpredictability and rapid developmental leaps
🌻 Slow to process a traumatic birth and ruminating thoughts
🌻 Forgetful of appointments or double booking
🌻 House may be cluttered due to trouble with executive functioning
🌻 Lack of self-care due to baby becoming a hyper focus or hyper fixation
🌻 Periods of high energy followed by crashes and burnout/shutdown
🌻 May have difficult relationship with own mother/parents due to undiagnosed neurodivergence and inability to believe mental health exists
🌻 May have a history of broken romantic relationships
🌻 Needs direct communication and validation
🌻 May find it difficult to identify their emotions due to alexithymia and so may not be very expressive or descriptive in appointments
🌻 Prone to high justice sensitivity and RSD – Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria
🌻 Seems like they have a split personality – can be overly expressive and chatty one week but then super quiet and withdrawn the next
🌻 May have previously been diagnosed with bipolar, EUPD, GAD. You can read a study published in 2024 relating to the experiences of autistic adults previously diagnosed with borderline or emotionally unstable personality disorder here
🌻 May have been under CAMHS or Eating disorder services in adolescence
🌻 May have a significant trauma history, due to undiagnosed neurodivergent parents, vulnerability in relationships, bullying etc
🌻 May have one or more of a number of co-occuring pain conditions such as fibromyalgia, endometriosis, hyper mobility and hEDS or other associated hormonal or health conditions such as PCOS, PMDD and POTS.
